dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
