Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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