Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Come share oat with me in your robe
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
