after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
