Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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