I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
