I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
