She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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