i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
