Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
