It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
