just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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