So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I got inside last night via doggy door
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Randomize
