You're completely useless in the revolution.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize