i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Randomize
