I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
