Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
