we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
