you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
