We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
