Your mouth is God's brothel.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
