when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
