My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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