I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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