we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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