i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
