I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
ok first of all what the fuck
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