and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
