No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
