he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
