people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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