Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
