if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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