last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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