Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
