I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
