Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
