I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
