I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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