im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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