please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize