have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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