Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
