have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
me + whiskey = a bad person
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
