therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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