Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
