dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
If I had your ass I would rule the world
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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