if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
