Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
