one might say we're banned from that church
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
