Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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