I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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